Michelle was on CASTLE, you guys! And she was awesome! Crystal and Shawn got interviewed by We Love Soaps. Also awesome! PSA: I would very much like to see Crystal, Hillary, Michael, and Jerry Van Dorn do God of Carnage. Three nights only at the Laurie Beechman? Make this happen, people. Welcome to the ninth in my series of angst-free Venice reviews with stunning co-writers kelinswriter andjaina47.
jaina47: “Have you watched yet!”
kelinswriter: “Jesus CHRIST.”
Hey, look, something seems to be hitting the fan oscillating above Venice Beach. Something is spraying all over town. And an episode all about Owen! You know I’m down with that. I love that boy.
This scene is so beautiful I kind of want to stay in it. So much stillness and quiet. Ani is so tender. It kills me.
It kills Ani.
kelinswriter: “I am glad that she did not spend the night at Lara’s waiting for her to get home. The keys in the door are a nice touch. Drunks do that a lot.”
jaina47: “Lara passed out on the couch is so sad. Ani putting the blanket over her with such resignation makes me wonder if she’s done this before. Yes, I’m thinking Gina. What else would I be thinking? 😀 And the music was perfect, I’m in so deep indeed. I really really loved the whole thing. It was so low key and understated but soooo much happened. I mean, I don’t think Jessica said one word in her whole scene and yet sooooo much was conveyed.”
kelinswriter: “You could kill someone with those earrings of hers.”
I think many of jaina47 the German Octopus’s predictions were wrong this week. Possibly because our speculation veered off into the PWP realm last night.
Meanwhile, back at the Colonel’s house, Gina is trying to manage her unmanageable man-boys.
kelinswriter: “Ok that ‘I guess his legs are broke’ line damn near sent me through the roof. ‘Is it ever enough for you” hits the Colonel where he lives.’ I am starting to wonder if the Colonel had a dad who was just like him. He got pushed so he pushed his kids. And now it’s occurring to him that maybe, he should have been nicer to them so that they’d actually want to take care of him in his old age. I think the Colonel thought if he raised them like soldiers they’d be fine. How’d he end up with these artistic freaks? He wasn’t a Hippie. What the fuck?”
Amber and Guya…Officially Not Funny.
jaina47: “Amber’s stuff is really heart wrenching. To the point where if I was Guya and I thought she was actually alive I might be giving her a hotline number or something.”
kelinswriter: “Guya looks so worn down. And then the bane of her existence appears, looking like a train wreck, and she just can’t deal. And yet, she gives in and agrees. In retrospect, I see the foreshadowing on so many levels. Why Guya gives and gives and gives.”
jaina47: “Yeah, Owen, talk to your local bartender! It’s like his job description. Whoa! I didn’t see him losing the gig coming. I like it. It adds layers to his already messed up situation with Sami and explains a little why he’s been so pissed off and tense/edgy with Van. Not that he wouldn’t before, but he’s already feeling bummed and like a loser and then having Van hitting on his girl…”
kelinswriter: “Okay, I may be hard on Owen sometimes, but I do love him. That being said…What a selfish, cowardly jackass. Thank you, Jamie, for calling him on it. I love how Jamie does his ‘wise counselor’ schtick, and you really expect him to just keep consoling. And then he blindsides him with a dose of reality.”
jaina47: “Hee. And it does explain why Owen’s ‘movie set’ always just looks like the beach. I just dismissed it as them using that as a convenient excuse for a set. Turns out it was supposed to just be the beach! Who knew!”
rysler: “I always assumed the movie set was somewhere else that Owen was just about to travel to. Turns out Van is smarter than both of us.”
Meanwhile, the Colonel is climbing out of his despair and beginning to notice things around him. Namely, Gina.
kelinswriter: “What I love about this is Gina discovers that yes, her father is an asshole…but he’s actually her kind of asshole. And that is the part that really PISSES you off about having a parent like that. When they actually turn into someone you think you could enjoy being around. This moment is hard to describe, when he starts actually asking her questions about her life. He’s treating her like an equal when he starts calling her on why she’s basically abandoned her life. And it kind of floors her to the point that she can’t even process it. He’s suddenly not following the script.”
jaina47: “OMG. The Colonel ‘showing an interest’ is the best thing ever. I kind of like him fighting back. Showing some spirit. Not that the dude isn’t a major ass, or I guess a colonel ass, in many respects, but I like that he’s showing different aspects. I suspect that he’s a complicated dude and I think I’m actually starting to like him. He’s not easy, but that’s okay. I loved the ‘why aren’t you out doing all the other things the kids do’ tone of the Colonel’s question. It was so parental. He really nailed it. Like, go be young instead of nagging me. Also if the Colonel starts trying to play matchmaker for Gina it would be both crazy and awesome.”
kelinswriter: “And then she runs her little rationalization that she’s been rehearsing – the story she’s told herself for how things have to be with Ani. And he fucking PUNCTURES it in a way no one has. Hardcore kicks her in the ass because he thinks she deserves better. ‘You’re my child and I expect excellence. You’re a lesbian, fine. Be the best fucking lesbian on the planet.’ Go Colonel.”
jaina47: “This conversation is so many shades of Olivia. If only someone had been around to tell her that just before the wedding week. Does this mean we’re leading up to their own version of the wedding week? You accept that? What the hell kind of crap attitude is that?” Yes, THANK YOU, Colonel.”
jaina47: “I like how the Colonel and Gina have kind of devolved into almost fond bickering. It’s like a routine with them now.”
Someone on twitter discovered this:
While Gina is revealing that she’s in love with Ani some perfect and unattainable woman, she’s wearing a shirt we have seen before. Thanks, show, for making me relive what is perhaps the SADDEST AND MOST AWFUL MOMENT IN ALL OF OTALIA. And I think what is actually relevant is what follows. You know, when they try to be ‘friends.’
Van seems to be a Grade A Douchebag. Or this could be a red herring. But he’s so deliciously sinister. I love it.
kelinswriter: “I think I might actually turn in my toaster for Van. That boy is just SO HOT.”
rysler: “He did look good in those sunglasses.”
kelinswriter: “And that belt and that sexy walk and and and–”
kelinswriter: “I think Sami might be turning in her Owen toaster for Van.”
jaina47: “Why do people always advise that other people should tell the truth about secrets? That’s such bullshit advice. If it wasn’t a big, major deal, they wouldn’t have a need to keep secret in the first place. Just say no to secret telling. Or don’t start keeping them at all. Geez. Yes, I know there’d be no soaps in the world if that advice ever got followed, but really, the generic spill it is not good advice.”
kelinswriter: “I love that last ‘what the hell is he up to’ look from Sami. She becomes the audience in that moment. Because I don’t quite know what he’s up to either.”
This is a nice contrast between Jamie, who now has Lara’s secret and must decide how best to protect Ani, Gina, and Lara, and Van, who now has Owen’s secret (possibly) and is using it for EVIL.
rysler: “Well, Jamie is right, secrets are killing his relationship, and Owen is right, Sami might dump his unemployed, sad, lying ass.”
kelinswriter: “I just…Gina’s killing herself trying to keep her life together and Owen is just wandering the beach like a homeless guy all day.”
kelinswriter: “Ooohh….Owen and Lara should hang out together! The ‘lying about the fact that I’m a fuckoff’ club. THEME. WE HAVE THEME.”
Which segues well into…
Michael Sabatino, he look gooooood. He’s such a good villain, isn’t he? He has called Michelle, who’s sitting in a red convertible, cowering from him. She cowers well. And nice confirmation that Lara and Gina are, in fact, the same person.
jaina47: “Hee! Alfalfa hair in the back! Sorry, couldn’t resist. He plays hard ass/sleazy dude so well.”
kelinswriter: “The notion of creative people being expected to be creative on an insane deadline also seems to be showing up a lot. You’d think these people worked in daytime or something.”
Why is Alan mad? Because everyone’s drunk! 😀
I couldn’t resist.
kelinswriter: “I love how relaxed they are together. This is a family. And we got a “peachy!” I’ve been waiting for that.”
jaina47: “Aw, very briefly, Gina was struggling to show some signs of maturity. It’s hard, but she’s working on it. I like it. No one changes completely over night. At least she’s attempting it. Um, for a very, very brief half a second. Way to go guys. Gina with her family bitching about the Colonel is her at her most unattractive. And when she was sincere, the way they just stared at her like she was an alien for a second was great.”
kelinswriter: “OK Asshole game. Which I love, by the way. First, Crystal losing it makes me giggle EVERY FREAKING TIME. Second, Owen hates him in a way that Gina doesn’t and maybe never has.”
jaina47: “I love the way she says generic like it’s the vilest thing she can think of.”
Guya is spending her nights as she always does lately. Reading a diary. Her own recollection of the events that took her sister’s life. She and Katie, driving back from a concert. Picking up Van at the sitter. We don’t know how old he was but he climbed out of his carseat in the back and into the front. Guya tried to put him back in his chair, and in doing so, knocked hot coffee all over Katie.
Van was a distraction. The terrible pain was a distraction. Then, instead of road, there was a tree, and Katie was dead.
And Guya is here.
And Van is…what?
jaina47: “Holy shit. I did not see that coming. It explains so much though about the way that Guya overcompensated with Gina and Owen and maybe even why Van really feels like the abandoned, step-kid or something. Wow.”
jaina47: “All in all I think it was a quieter, more introspective episode than usual. Everything was very low key but intense. I liked it, a lot. So much unfolded, surged forward and developed. Now I really can’t wait for next week. I like that this episode raised at least as many questions as it answered.”
So many questions. Let’s poll. Why did rysler link to Gingerbread? How long was Gina gone after the Richard thing? Where did she go? Who, Katie or Guya, was driving the car? How did it all unravel?
WHAT IS VAN GOING TO DO NEXT?