Welcome to the fourth in my series of angst-free, complaint-free Venice reviews. This post contains spoilers. This is now officially co-written by the dear kelinswriter. Everyone’s reading Once Upon a Dream, right? Right.
I still have this week’s behind the scenes open on my computer. Gina T. is making an adorable face.
Onto Venice! This episode was so much fun. Guya has found a man to rub her feet. It’s what we all want.
She apparently had to get drunk before she could call a cute guy over to tell him all about her previous husband. And that she wrote a book. Shawn Christian looks at her with doe eyes. She panics. He appeals to her hippie sensibilities. She totally wants to smell his aura.
But a picture frame breaks! The picture of her with Gina and Owen’s mom. She really misses her sister.
kelinswriter: “ZEBRA SAMI!”
Meanwhile, Owen and Sami are making pasta in what appears to be a tiny apartment kitchen. If this is someone’s real kitchen, I apologize.
Sami tells Owen to lighten up about his father but he drinks (Fisheye again, I think) because it’s VENICE. Alcohol: The cause of and solution to all of life’s problems. Owen says his job is cool and he “got to throw a football all day.” He’s trying to sound impotent commercial actor here, but that actually does sound kind of cool. Maybe he’s just modest.
jaina47: “Sami’s “GIFT ME NOW!” face is adorable!”
(I don’t even.)
Owen is wearing a great shirt. And great jeans. He’s stalwart and mild as she tells him she met VAN. I like Owen’s security. And his big strong arms.
There’s some crazy magnets on that thing. NBC wat?
Gina calls Owen and has this crazy phone voice over telling him that there are no more nurses left. I love it. Very [title of show].
We cut to Gina, who’s in the best set ever:
(That’s the whole set!)
APPARENTLY GINA AND ANI ARE TALKING EVERY DAY. EEEE. Gina is on her best behavior. It’s killing her. KILLING HER. This time we get to see Ani rather than just hear her disembodied voice, because it’s Ani. Talking to Gina makes Ani happy. She doesn’t know how she feels about that.
jaina47: “Um, let me take this moment to say, DAMN, Jessica Leccia. Wow. So gorgeous.”
jaina47: “Omg, I’m not even done watching this scene and Gina is so ridiculously in love with her.”
jaina47: “Their chemistry is just like…wow.”
jaina47: “I need more adjectives.”
I rewound “What’s for dinner?” about a dozen times. Gina’s using her cute voice. Stay for the sexy “I love your chicken piccata.”
Guya and Katherine have settled in for a seance thing. Lest we forget, this series kicked off with Hillary B Smith and Tina Sloan being awesome together. Guya is hilariously bitchy.
kelinswriter: “YOU’RE A BLOCKER!”
At 6:38, watch the dog.
“The other night I had dinner with my friend Betsy Meyer and some very attractive man sent over a drink to me.” That is the most hilariously sad older lady line I have heard in a while. Katherine tries to call Guya on her bullshit, but because she is a lady and Guya is a bulldog, Guya quickly triumphs.
FYI, this scene gets funnier with repeated viewings. As you might suspect.
Guya gets a MYSTERIOUS PHONE CALL. I like that Liz Keifer has her own theme music. Yes it took me four episodes to notice, shut up.
I just like her so much.
kelinswriter: “OK. Back on the tank top.”
Gina’s moving into the Colonel’s house. There’s just so much tension here. I love it. I sort of cringe and simultaneously get excited, because angry!despondent Crystal is at the top of her game. She’s the master at uncomfortable situations and this is a pretty fucking big one.
Do you think if Gina had kids she’d treat them like this?
Disdain. It’s something you practice in the mirror.
“This is how it’s going to be?” I actually flushed at that line.
Lara’s on a beautiful, cold beach, working on her book. Her editor calls. Nadia makes hilarious faces while appeasing her, then gets her drink on. For the first time, we see her look guilty about it. Nervous. Worried.
Meanwhile Sami is at the nicest soup kitchen ever, apparently, and Van shows up to hit on her. Or do good work. Whatever.
I really want him to take his shirt off. Those V-necks are just teasing me.
Is this series about all the shady men people meet in Hollywood?
Gina comes jogging down the beach and I have a Baywatch moment. Women who work out are hot.
Gina wakes Lara up. Lara probably stinks of booze.
kelinswriter: “Nadia plays drunk well.”
kelinswriter: “And entirely embarrassed at being busted.”
rysler: “Yeah. I can actually smell her breath watching that scene.”
kelinswriter: “I am amused at the metatext of GINA of all people busting someone for being drunk.”
kelinswriter: “But I also think that may feed in.”
kelinswriter: “Gina knows plenty about Ani being treated bad by someone who drinks too much.”
kelinswriter: “She’s not gonna let it happen again.”
In a further testament to Nadia’s acting, she manages to convey both “Oh, shit” and “You’re a creeper and I’m Ani’s girlfriend now.” Conflicting sentiments, nicely balanced. That “Yeah, you too” with the eye roll… priceless bitchery. I adore it.
“Broken” by Jen Foster (which I quite like, I have to say.)